Ever said goodbye to someone you never wanted to say goodbye to?
Today was my first time. There once was this guy who I loved. Loved so much I was willing to move out with him if he asked. One day, I made a mistake and after telling him, he didn't want me anymore. Hearing that he called me a stupid b**** and thinks I sleep with random guys...really?! I don't think anything else could hurt more than hearing from the man you love, that you are a whore.
The night went from, "Wooo shots!" to "I f***ing hate him!" in seconds. I look back at last year, thinking I was so lucky to have him in my life and now all I want to do is hate him. Hate him for letting him make my life miserable and hating that I love him so much. There has never been a day where I dont think of him. Wondering what he is doing or where he is. Or even wondering how his little boy is.
I hate my self for loving him mostly. One things for sure, I'm done. I'm saying goodbye forever. Even if it hurts, I know its the only thing left to do.
Song of the week: "Hate That I Love You" by Rhianna/Neyo
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