New Beginings

It's odd how a few months ago I said goodbye to someone and now instead of mopping around like normal people do or more like I usually do, I'm getting my ass out there and actually met someone who is ten times better than him. Yes, my feelings, for the person who will remain nameless through out the rest of my life now, are still pretty much intact but I feel like my time with that person has come to an end. I'll feel sad for losing my best friend and someone I loved but I was not happy and I want to be happy. I want someone who will treat me right. Someone who is honest and caring. Someone who makes me feel wanted and special. Yesterday, I met "new guy" 's friends. It was the most incredible feeling I've had in a long time. For the very first time in years, I felt like I was truly wanted and made me realize that leaving "the one who remains nameless" was the best choice I could have made. It hurts so much but sometimes if you love something so much you have to let it go. Some day he will realize that taking me for granted was the worst mistake of his life if he hasn't already but I will have completely moved on and I'm hoping that things with "new guy" will continue on its awesome course. He's everything I need in a guy and I'm starting to really, really like him. I'm at the point where I find my self thinking about him and at the same time I'm so excited yet so scared to think that maybe he doesn't feel the same way. Yet again, dating is a risk and I'm back to that spot where I'm trying to build my heart up again, with tape, staples, or what ever I can to mend it back together.