Where Ever You Go

 It's been an interesting past 16 years. I went from having a boyfriend junior year to being single, finishing high school and starting college then getting into what would become a 2 to 3 yr relationship. We broke up and then men came in and out of my life. Recent one was an epic fail but after that epic fail I ran into someone I never in my wildest dreams thought that I ever would be in love with.  The guy who kissed me near the bushes in the dark right outside of church when I was 17. I never thought I would be with the guy who bought me a huge teddy bear for Valentine's day and had to lie about who had given it to me or the guy who gave me 6 separate V-day cards to tell me how much he liked me. Even way after we broke up I always kept those v-day cards and when I came close to throwing then away, something inside me always made me keep them. I thought of him occasionally and yes even ran into him a few times unintentionally. There were moments where he made me mad when I'd see him because he reminded me how much he had hurt me, but as the years passed I realized that I didn't want to dwell on the past and keep grudges. That I was getting too old for holding on to something that not only didn't matter anymore but that was so long ago during a time in my life where our relationship had not been serious. He did however show me my first heart ache but when he reached out to me late last year, he showed me something I had been missing out on. As adults our interaction was not only so much different than when we were kids but he showed me hope. There's this song called "Where Ever You Will Go" and it reminds me of how I was replaced in his life and yes we were not together for a while but in the end we made it back to each other. And now, he is the person who I could never live with out. I still find it eerie at times that we actually are together and in love. Then again it was not our time and even though he did replace me with someone for 7 years, we found our way back to each other with out having a clue we would. Reality is, you never know what way your life will head when you pray for your heart to be healed.